Earlier on today I read an article by Jen Wilkin: 3 Female Ghosts that Haunt the Church. I thought it was a really helpful article about the way in which wrong views about women haunt the church. Jen identifies three in particular – the usurper, the temptress, and the child.

It’s a really helpful article and I would recommend you to read it! She concludes the article:

Do some women usurp authority? Yes. Do some seduce? Yes. Do some lack emotional or intellectual maturity? Yes. And so do some men. But we must move from a paradigm of wariness to one of trust, trading the labels of usurper, temptress, child for those of ally, sister, co-laborer. Only then will men and women share the burden and privilege of ministry as they were intended.

It made me think once again about the purpose of Friend Zone. One of the reasons we need a site such as this is that I think too many churches have decided that the Christian sexual ethic is reduced to “marry someone of the opposite sex, stay with them for life, and don’t ever have an affair.” Now, those are all important elements of the Christian sexual ethic, but it cuts out a huge amount!

I wonder if we don’t need a reboot of the whole way that men and women relate to each other. Rather than seeing men and women as being in competition, or only in a sexual way, men and women need to rediscover the glory of what it means to be truly masculine or feminine. We need to rediscovery the glory of God in making us male and female.

A lot of the time on this site I’ve talked about how many Christians and churches see the Bible as a list of “Thou shalt nots”. I believe we need to (re)discover the beauty instead of what God would have us do, the fullness of our identity as men and women.

All of these things I hope to explore over time in the coming months…